Horses can talk

So Chorrie likes his inner thighs being scratched and manoeuvred his bum towards me for a scratch. I told him I'd do it after the tissue manipulation. So did that then went to scratch him, was very clearly told not now, just by the look on his face and the general 'you've hacked me off' air about him.

He doesn't like the tissue manipulation but suffers it because he is a good boy.

Thirty minutes later I was forgiven and he had his scratch :-)

They do talk you just have to listen

Nicky Desailly - Visit 7 - 28th May

So started with H wave on right shoulder to enable to be raised for long wave ultrasound.

Then two sessions of long wave ultrasound with me holding leg.

Then tissue mobilisation and leg stretches

No laser on ligament tonight but continue with ice.

Going forwards

Laser neck and shoulders both sides, tissue mobilisation, laser ligament and ice as normal.

Keep with taking out for leg stretch and pick of grass.

Next appointment Friday 07:30, then finally on Monday 6th the one month scan when hopefully we can start a formal walk regime as we'll know how the ligament is doing.

Keep watch on digital pulses.

Lesson 3 - We have canter

Having a memory fail :-(

Wind was stupid but Soly was Mr Sensible lesson as always started off in walk.

Right hand better at keeping a contact now need to balance it a little more as could easily get back into habit of hanging on right.

Today we did canter and my foetal twin made an appearance *tsk* always a bit of a last try behaviour when things aren't working and I lose my composure go foetal! So should I happen to sit up and on my ample a$$ and position my seat for canter then oddly enough it happens.

So if I can recall left and right correctly (and I didn't!) found right canter easier to maintain and easier for Soly to go into canter; left rein less easy for Soly to go into canter and harder for me to maintain and less room to sit.

Leg yield on left rein to right did feel better, still can't quite feel the fall back onto left shoulder.

Good progress need to drown foetal twin!

Lesson 2 - 22nd May Weird

Weird sort of morning, no idea where 08:00 - 09:15 went but whoosh by it did.

So late to yard <bad mummy> quickly threw Fred out and lucked out and iced Chorrie.

Got Soly in with Gill and dressed him up in pink - the joy of a black horse they look good in every colour :-)

Got on and started off on a loose rein which is weird because it is only the second time I've ridden Soly and yet there I was on a loose rein and not bothered. So that is good in fact it is more than good but given this is a swear free post we'll leave it as more than good. So it just shows that I can be different and that change is there for the taking. Need to take this learning forwards onto Chorrie.

What we did

walk on a long rein

walk pirouettes (large ones)

collect and forwards the walk

leg yield on diagonal

collect and forwards the trot

shoulder in

Take homes

Need to have a contact, not taking the contact will not encourage Soly into contact on right side. So have contact on RHS with view to getting Soly into that rein so on left rein ask for counter bend then straight then true bend and then when in the rein "stretching" the right hand side so the rein can become longer.

Give an aid get a response stop bloody nagging him!

Crossing hands over will not work try a leg aid!

Can only go forwards with a soft neck, can only trot from a good walk.

No activity in walk it will be hard to trot (believe this one and well OWN it!) and trot will be inactive. I do like to hope for the best and trot regardless, fair enough in a test situation when you have to trot at a marker but no excuse in a lesson.

Overall bloody (ok I lied about it being a swear free post) chuffed second time on Soly and feeling confident. Also now I don't mind an audience am officially weird :-)

Lesson 1 - 20th May 2011

So background, my beloved Chorrie is off games for at least six months, so cheekily asked Gill if I could ride Soly in lessons with Clare and she said yes. I was and am blown away by her kindness.

So went down and got the black beauty in (Soly is a black Welsh Sec D) who looked at me with WTF are you doing in my field with my headcollar :-)

Groomed him, picked out feet, brushed out tail slightly sad to see the silver glitter of yesterday had faded away went and got his bridle and saddle. Put saddle on (Soly not me!) and thought duck no way will my fat a$$ fit in that! Had a horrible vision of trying to get all of my a$$ in the saddle and was convinced as we rose to the trot there'd be a loud pop as my bum made a bid for freedom.

My cunning plan was that Clare would hop on and suss him out for me, but sadly no as part of my education I was to be up first.

So got on and my bum fitted and there was room so either

1/ seat is roomier than it looks

or

2/ my bum is not big

sadly I think it is 1/ :-D

So walked Soly around the arena and he felt tense and from his ears confused. Slowly we both relaxed, tested the go and slow buttons, then put him some halts. I was struck by how much softer and thus nicer in the contact he is compared to Chorrie. Was less pleased to hear that whilst my mutant right hand wasn't holding; the mutantness had schlepped across to my left hand.

Put in some halts, initially progressive, then sharper but without engagement behind, then with some engagement behind.

Leg yield on left rein harder for me to ride than on right.

Trot - if tension in neck you will feel it behind, needs a soft neck to be able to go forwards.

Collecting trot initially led to walk transition, need to watch/feel where he puts himself on the circle and if he is falling in/out.

Need to watch left hand no backward traction.

Really pleased at first session, impressed particularly that I had the confidence to get on a horse that is not mine especially as I haven't ridden for three weeks. Last time I rode a horse that wasn't mine was back in June 2006.

Great start :-)

Almost two weeks later

and we're settling into a routine:-

05:30 Get up, pill Millie, feed cats. let dogs out

06:15 Arrive at yard start lasering, then put on cold compression boots and massage pad

06:30 Turn Fred out

06:40 Start mucking out Chorrie / Fred / doing feeds

07:00 Cold boots off

07:15 Laser, groom Chorrie, cold boots on

07:45 Cold boots off, out for pick of grass

08:10 Leave yard

09:00 Home, shower, bowl of muesli, drive to work

10:02 Arrive work

16:30 Leave work, go home walk dogs

17:30 Leave for yard

18:15 Arrive yard, laser,

18:30 Cold boots on and massage pad, start skipping out

19:00 Pick of grass

19:20 get Fred in

19:45 Leave yard

20:15 Arrive home

22:30 Bed

I feel like I never see Tony :-( as of this week am getting wonderful YO to do two PM shifts. Don't want to abuse her helpfulness by asking too much as it is going to be a long old haul.

Would love some foresight to know if the laser is doing any good!

Out of options - Millie

Just off phone with my lovely vet A; so her calcium continues to be high we have increased the steroid and will retest in a couple of weeks.

Can't find anyone who has actually done op before in a cat so must have misheard about referral previously.

So A is of opinion we manage condition and just take it day by day.

As a vet and surgeon she'd like to open her up as she doesn't want to admit defeat to there being no options available to us, but as a cat owner, vet and surgeon knows it wouldn't be in Millie's best interest as potential to do more harm is too great.

Weird thing is I actually feel relieved referral operation not possible as I did feel it would be too stressful for her to be away and in 'hospital' for two weeks post op to stabilise blood calcium levels, but didn't like idea of not doing it.

Decision made for me.

Information

Too much information running through my brain
Too much information driving me insane
Too much information running through my brain
Too much information driving me insane

So rang Liz (my vet) to go over Friday as information went over me on Friday.

So damage is extensive as in most of ligament and bad as in not minor!

Stem cell is out as too damaged and cells would almost certainly migrate and create other 'issues'. Stem cell best where damage is localised e.g. core lesion.

May go out for pick of grass but no formal in hand walking until second scan (5th June) due to extent of damage.

Spa is a good idea but not for C, Liz feels risk of further injury on lorry too high and leaving him there not a good idea for him as he is so sensitive. So need to ice ice ice.

Can start passive mobilisations next week.

Liz has spoken to another physio who is positive about use of laser and thinks it will reduce inflammation.

Sending Tony ice pack shopping tomorrow then will formulate timetable to muster troops who have kindly rallied round

Hope

OK so normal service slowly being resumed, I may as well hope for a full return to form for the boy as otherwise the next few months will be pretty hopeless if I spend time lasering. massaging, hand walking, grooming, etc etc and not believe there is hope.

If I don't think there is hope then I may as well stop now, turn him out and cross my fingers.

So there is hope and I'm going to do my very best to stack the odds in our favour.

So from here forwards I travel in hope

Questions for Liz

Stem cell treatment

Paul Tapner Spa

When can he start walking out?

When introduce physio?

When ultrasound?

MSM answer (GH)

My heart is cracked

Somewhere on the M25 last night my heart cracked.

It isn't broken as it was when I lost Skunk but the pain is real and visceral. I'm mourning the loss of my plans for 2011 and I'm mourning for Chorrie with three months of box rest for him stretching ahead into the far distance.

Everyone keeps telling me it'll be OK I'll be able to ride him again, well yes possibly and I do appreciate people are trying to help, but it doesn't help. This for me is a loss and I'm in mourning and in real pain and at some point normal service will be resumed but right here right now it fucking well hurts, real physical pain. I'm also angry; why Chorrie, why such a lovely kind horse? There is also guilt could I have prevented this?

Was I imagining things on Sunday or was that an early warning sign, or was it as so many times before me being me? Over anxious analytical rider imagining issues no one else can see, and let's be honest here the judge thought he was OK and that it was me hanging onto the right rein (stress habit) and lo when I didn't do that in the Novice normality was restored. In the second warm up I was happy (walking on long rein) and had no worries about his soundness. If Wednesday hadn't happened the first set of worries would have been like so many times before forgotten and behind me.

Did my riding cause this injury? It is pure coincidence I hold right and he broke right? What if I'd decided to keep him in Wednesday morning, but even my vet said turn him out and why wouldn't you with no heat, no lumps no bumps and no significant lameness, just a general something is wrong? How many horses have been turned out under such circumstances and how many then do their check ligament later that day?

Did he actually do it in the stable? When I got him in for the farrier Wednesday 15:00 he was walking with more placement left *but* even as I walked him up I wasn't thinking sh1t he needs a vet now, just a Hmm this needs looking at. When I stripped his boots off and picked his feet out no lumps, heat or bumps so did he do the final insult in the stable in that hour whilst he waited in for the farrier to do Fred?

Logically you'd have to conclude the injury did occur in the stable as swelling and oedema would have been fairly rapid given the severity shown on the scan Friday. So it probably was a UXB waiting to blow, and the question isn't really would not turning him out have prevented this but what factors caused this to happen and what can be changed to reduce future recurrence?

The stark reality is my boy is 19; he belies his age but tissue healing will not be as good in a 19yo as a 11yo. Statistically the other one is now more likely to go.

Please don't try to jolly me out of this, this sucks really sucks

Dorchester Abbey

Lovely walk around Dorchester parked by the Abbey and walked down to Day's Lock then along the Thames.

Haven't been there for > 6 years as have never taken Lily on that walk, must make more effort especially as now no riding to get to more places with puppies.

They had lovely swim in dregs of Isis

Hunters May Day 2011

Today we went back to Hunters, love the venue, well run, nice clean loos, the ever lovely Frank and of course fat cat :-)

Loaded up at 09:50 and arrived at Hunters 10:40, parked up and went to say hello to Yvonnne who I spied in the distance and parked next to her was Sue Baker so lovely to see them both.

Tacked up the boy and was in the warm up for 11:30 (test at 12:04) warm up started well then warm up filled up and C spent most of it with his ears back, feeling 'humpy' over the back and just not himself. Decided to go ahead anyway and see how he felt in test. Didn't feel as per normal wasn't convinced he was right, but equally not convinced he was wrong.

Asked Tony to hold him and trotted over to judge's car asked steward if I could approach the judge. Spoke to judge (Maggie Copus) who was wonderful as she was between tests and could have quite rightly asked me to come back at break. Anyway her opinion was that he wasn't lame but was unbalanced and was I aware I was holding onto right rein on left turns *bangs head*.

So that pretty much explained why left rein was worse. Buggering stress habit!

Back to lorry, offered him water which he refused so offered apple juice which went down in one :-) loosed girth and loaded him up for half an hour or so, quick look at video decided he wasn't lame and set about learning novice test.

Clare and Katherine arrived :-) lovely to see them walking to lorry, tacked boy up and back into warm up. Husband bravely agreeing to call test. Warm up quiet so walked boy on loose rein (that would NOT have been possible last year!) did a bit of trot and into indoor.

Indoor looking very smart having been painted and C became a pocket rocket. Was so pleased he was joyful just decided to go with it and just let him enjoy. So test was a bit whizzy and he was not over the back but he was listening.

AND I wasn't hanging onto the front end and was enjoying his being happy; playing the long game with this one! Free walk on a long rein was a little scenic but rider woke up before we we landed at B as opposed to F.

Collected novice sheet comments spot on had quick glance at prelim sheet again comments spot on but couldn't collect prelimn sheet as was at that point lying second (!) suspect scorer confused and didn't realise class was mixed test prelim to elementary.

Lovely lovely day :-)