Bonbon got me thinking
Happiness is IMO something you need to cultivate, you need to stop and capture the moment and 'bank' it for those tougher times. You also need to learn to recognize it, capture the moment and acknowledge it when you do have it.
I also think there is a lot to be said for counting what you do have and not what you don't, as Miranda the Panda said "Negative thinking is a habit, just as much as positive thinking"
Chorrie was off games for ages, I could have wallowed and as Bonbon said carried my own little black cloud around with me but the outcome would have been the same, I'd have just made the journey harder.
A colleague at work has a mantra 'travel in hope' I am full of admiration for her. Hence why I tried my best to travel in hope with Chorrie and even though I didn't think too much about him coming sound again, I did say thanks for just having him in my life and being able to kiss his muzzle.
That said I don't believe it helps much to be told others have it worse. I thought what RoxR wrote on a blog entry summed it up very well
"While it is always horrid to realise that other people have some truly terrible situations in life, it by no means diminishes a person's own life's challenges at their own particular time - everyone is as deserving of a hug and support when they need it, no matter what the scale is."
Grief isn't relative, my horse being off twenty months doesn't make it any better for the person with a horse off two months/days etc.
Acknowledge your sadness and hopefully it too will pass.
When people said to me he'll be back as good as he was, clearly they do not know that and the first few times I did make that argument, then I realised they were trying to be supportive and just said thank you. I still may not have believed it, but just like when someone dies what do you say? You say something and we need to accept it in the way it was meant not as their knowing the literal truth.
I think assuming the best of people helps for happiness.
I also think there is little point in taking things personally, my mother always used to say 'if the cap fits' so generally I do my best to assume it isn't personal (even if the cap fits I sure as hell am NOT going to admit that!), anyway even if it is, then never complain, never explain serves me better and totally ignore it.
This took a great deal of willpower earlier this year, but I think doing so made a rough time less rough, remind me of this later!
So happiness for me is a habit and yes life can be a sh1t storm but you keep putting one foot in front of the other and eventually this too will pass.
And if all else fails then as Joel Osteen said
"If you cannot be positive then at least be quiet"
Well it amused me!
Friday, 20 December 2013
Colic Surgery and Postoperative Ileus in HorsesBy Kentucky Equine Research Staff · November 12, 2013
Studies indicate that about four to 10 out of every 100 horses can be expected to colic each year. Many mild cases of equine colic resolve without treatment, and even more severely affected horses can often be helped with pain medications, hydration, and other supportive care. For some colics, however, surgery is the only treatment.
No one knows the cause of postoperative ileus, which occurs in an estimated 10 to 50% of equine surgical colic cases.When a horse needs this very serious surgery, owners need to consider cost, the physical demands of the procedure on the horse, care during the recovery period, and the risks of both the surgery and the hours and days immediately after the operation. One of the most serious complications of abdominal surgery in horses is postoperative ileus, a condition in which the intestines react to the shock of surgery by failing to regain motility. Gut contents cannot be moved, gas builds up, and tissues can die, leading to a second surgery and sometimes a fatal outcome if the condition can’t be reversed.
No one knows the cause of postoperative ileus, which occurs in an estimated 10 to 50% of equine surgical colic cases. Of these horses, up to 80% may die or be euthanized. Recent research suggests there is a significant inflammatory component to postoperative ileus, possibly triggered by unavoidable handling of the horse's intestines during surgery. Researchers have also learned that intestinal macrophages, the specialized white blood cells that rid the body of damaged tissue, and mast cells likely play a role in developing and maintaining ileus.
The diagnosis of postoperative ileus is not always straightforward, as most horses will naturally show some signs of discomfort after abdominal surgery. Pain also could be due to mechanical obstructions or other surgical complications. Besides signs of mild to severe colic, several important criteria for a diagnosis of ileus are heart rate remaining above 40 beats per minute; evidence of a fluid-distended small intestine on rectal examination or ultrasound; and four or more liters of nasogastric reflux on a single intubation or more than two liters on each of several repeated intubations.
Treatment options for postoperative ileus may include one or more therapies including nasogastric decompression, administration of fluids and electrolytes, medications to prevent endotoxemia and other infection, management of pain and inflammation, and use of lidocaine or another drug that facilitates the bowel in moving its contents (prokinetics). Offering the horse something to eat as soon as possible during the recovery period is helpful in preventing or lessening the severity of postoperative ileus, and hand-walking is also suggested as soon as the horse is able to move with coordination.
The use of carboxymethylcellulose, an intestinal lubricant, is somewhat controversial because of conflicting research reports as to whether it reduces or increases the chance of adhesions after abdominal surgery. There are also mixed opinions on whether a second surgery is beneficial. This option can sometimes locate the problem and correct blockages, but there is the potential for more harm to the horse that is already challenged. There is some evidence that horses undergoing a second colic surgery soon after the initial procedure have a reduced survival rate and more complications during recovery.